MC EMCEE B

Life has involved a LOT of opportunities to be on a microphone lately and boy, howdy, has that been fun. I LOVE a mic. LOVE. People say "how do you do that?" and I think, well, I love to talk.

Why would I not LOVE my talking projected to way more people than possible without a microphone?

Some mornings you wake up and something reminds you of someone you miss, someone who made you sad and probably doesn't deserve the space in your mind that morning. And, boo, cheering section stares at their feet and shuffles.

My friends, the answer is always, ALWAYS Beyonce.

Beyonce will tell you that he "showed his ass and baby, you saw the real him." She will remind you that he is most certainly NOT "irreplaceable" and she will also wag a finger, give a spin and raise an eyebrow. Because you? YOU are AMAZING. And fierce. And him? He sucks. He is dumb. Remember? He showed his ass! He did NOT "put a ring on it" - and thank God, because you dodged a bullet. Some men are "soldiers". You need those. The others? Not so much.

Beyonce will remind you of these things anywhere you like. In the kitchen in your sweatpants (you look athletic and strong). When applying makeup (you don't really need it, you're "feelin' so crazy right now"). Also, when cooking ravioli for 4 year olds. Which needs no explanation about your awesomeness, right?

I'm not sure Beyonce realizes the scope of her reach on the modern day breakup but, then again, she probably doesn't need to be told. Because she is teaching you to "put your love on top".